Achievement Unlocked! – Level 22

Platform: Xbox One
Time to Complete: 3 – 4 Hours
Gamerscore Available: 1000G
Gamerscore Achievable: 1000G

Oh count your lucky, lucky, lucky stars. This game is good and it’s an easy 1000G. We’re taking another break from playing games like Roblox and King Kong again to focus on a game I picked up a while ago solely for achievements. I was surprised as to how fun it was. So, on with the game.

I’m going to guide you through the entire game. All four worlds of it, with all the collectables and everything. It’s primarily a stealth game, but if I can do a stealth game, everyone can.

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5 Games I Hate that Everybody Else Loves

The very first post I wrote for was the “5 Games I Like that Everybody Else Hates” and I thought it fitting that I finish the series off as it’s my one year anniversary(ish) at Updownright. So to celebrate, I’ll be talking about the games that I love to hate that you all love to, well, love. Please, don’t kill me. These are all my opinions. If you like these games (or series) then good on you, well done, nice one. If you hate these games like I do, well, you’re special in my eyes.

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2

Get your pitchforks ready, it only gets worse from here. Yes the “critically acclaimed” terrorism them up shooter Modern Warfare 2 failed to impress me when I first played it. The campaign was lack luster, failing to expand on the already perfect Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare, after World at War, (phenomenal game also), I had high hopes for this one.

I did play it a lot when it came out, but I was young and a bit thick. So I went back and played it recently, never before have I been so underwhelmed by a game in my entire life. The special ops game mode that the game added wasn’t really anything special, oh god that was a good one. Unlike special ops, which required you and a friend to play through a number of minigame esq levels for 3 gold stars. Some of those missions being the training course from the first level of the game but for two people and one where one lucky person gets to man an AC1-30 and the unlucky sod gets to run around a field from that one level in Cod:4.

Don’t even get me started on the multiplayer, it definitely pushed the boat out a bit more for multiplayer. By a bit I mean a lot, so we can blame it as one of the main reasons we now have Snoop Dogg voice packs for £12.99 nowadays.


Oh Titanfall. I really did try to like this one, I actually tried. I played it multiple times, some times I liked it, other times I hated it. The impression it left all round after these sessions was a resounding “meh”. When I was strapped for hard drive space this was the first game I un-installed, and that was when I had D4: Dark Dreams Don’t Die installed, so if I thought Titanfall was a bit worse than that pile of shit, Christ.

The multiplayer only game has been quite the mystery to me. Especially moreso when they add a story. A single player would’ve worked great, like the next-gen version of Chromehounds, but it was not to be. Instead it’s a multiplayer only game that tries to incorporate a story. But as the maps are random and the story progresses no matter which team wins, it makes for a jumbled mess of a story. I know people won’t be playing this game for the story, but it’s clear that if they put a story into the game they wanted at least someone to pay attention to it. And I did. And it’s shit.

The class system was borderline Call of Duty and I found no use in changing out the weapons, along with the burn cards which I completely forgot about because they’re about as useful as building a boat out of water. The game seems to have been made around the idea of “Titans first, everything else later”, which is fine, you just have to include the rest of the fun part of the game, I’ll just presume they forgot.


Cell shaded graphics and fast paced FPS games just don’t do good things to my eyes. Now I don’t just mean the first Borderlands game, I mean the entire series. I’m sure it’s fairly fun with friends, but it hurts my eyes. I’m not saying the game looks bad, cell shaded graphics are awesome, but it’s too fast paced for me to play and it’s the only game that has the reward of giving me a headache and making me genuinely ill. So thanks for that Borderlands.

The game is an open world RPG type game. To be honest if I’m going to play an RPG that’s open world then I’m going to play something by Bethesda. Now props to 2K for trying, but it just didn’t capture my attention. I played a good chunk of Borderlands with Joseph a few months ago, I think it captured his attention, but then again so can a piece of string and a spoon.

As for the actual gameplay and humour? Yeah, it’s fine. I liked it when we were introduced to a character it would give us a little caption that was a 50/50 chance of being chuckle worthy or facepalm to the kidneys with a knife worthy. Also, why is the big guy always “big guns ‘n’ shit”? I would’ve loved it if the big beefy guy that looks like the apocalypse version of John Cena was the stealthy one.

Dead Island


Now, Dead Island was made by the same people who made Dying Light. I loved Dying Light, it’s a large open world space full of zombies where you craft things to stay alive and everyone on the island is a B-List actor. Dead Island, well, I honestly can’t remember much of this game. I was going to go back and play it to see what I didn’t like about it, but I’ll just go from memory because I don’t give enough of a shit to put it in my Xbox again.

I think it was mainly due to the hype that made this game explode. I remember it being glitchy and sub par, but somehow it garnered a lot of user acclaim. Other than the trailer that had nothing to do with the game, I didn’t play it until Dead Island Riptide had been out for a few years. I have a copy of Riptide, it’s been in my Xbox once, so I could check it worked.

That’s my main problem with the series, why play Dead Island when you can play Dead Rising. Or Dying Light, the companies better game. Hell, there’s so many better co-op zombie games. Dead Rising 2, Dying Light, the Left 4 Dead series, Resident Evil 6 I just don’t get why someone would want to play this when it’s unpolished and pretty much broken.

Hell, but what do I know, it’s getting another sequel, that’ll be the fourth game in the series then.

Payday 2

Well if I wasn’t already unpopular enough, here’s the final nail in the coffin. Payday 2 is a buggy mess. That is literally what it is. I’m sorry, but even if you’re a fan of the game, you must know deep down that it’s a buggy game with ethically and morally dead developers who will stop at nothing to make a bit of extra cash that they don’t need because Payday 2 is more popular than Jesus H. Corbett.

The amount of DLC is absurd, the developers clearly only want enough money to buy so many swimming pools that England becomes an impoverished nation and we all have to bow down to the Overkill Overlords. Also, the fact that they released the “Crimewave Edition” which was basically an Xbox One and PS4 release that included all the DLC is now redundant seeing as though they release a £4.99 DLC pack every week on Steam. Here’s hoping they do a DLC disc, it’ll probably take up about 50GB.

I understand the appeal, I don’t understand why the execution was critically acclaimed.

Speaking of executions, mine will be taking place a day after this article is released, be sure to pick up your pitchforks and flaming torches from the stands outside the stadium.

Guitar Hero Live Review

So the dawn of gaming peripherals is back, dragging along the rotting carcass that is Guitar Hero and Rockband. I got this for Christmas and I’ve been playing it on and off for the past few months. And what a downhill slope that has been.

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An Hour With: Turning Point: Fall of Liberty

Another WW2 shooter? Oh joy. But wait, this is an alternate history WW2 shooter? Fair enough then! I thought I’d use this as a way to get through my backlog also, and what better way to do that than to play all the damned shooters I’ve bought.

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Achievement Unlocked – Truth or Lies

Platform: Xbox 360
Time to Complete: 1 – 2 Hours
Gamerscore Available: 1000G
Gamerscore Achievable: 1000G

This game is good. Lie. 1000G please. Unfortunately it isn’t as easy as that, I wish it was, but no, we’re going to need one or two things. Firstly, you need the microphone that comes with the Lips games. Luckily I had two for whatever reason, but it’s the only way the game will work I believe.

Now then, starting the game you’ll need to calibrate your microphone and make an account name. Register eight separate names after calibrating your microphone to unlock three separate achievements:

Now that you’ve done these three. Exit out to the main menu, start-up a “Long Game” with two profiles. With the first account, try to aim for always being truthful. The second account for lies. The voice calibration is awful and this system will probably fall through pretty quickly, just keep trying to make it truths for account 1 and lies for account 2.

The very first question, answer it in less than 6 seconds by filling the bar (stick the microphone to your throat and yell or something, that’s what I did) to unlock:

As this is on account 1, it should hopefully register as the truth, which will also unlock:

Now obviously use account 2, take more than 9 seconds to answer the question, this will unlock:

As you’ve told your first lie in the game (hopefully it worked) you will also unlock:

Now you’ll be onto your third question. For the next two achievements just let the timer run out. It’ll unlock you:

Do it twice more to unlock:

Now after doing all this round one should be over. If you managed to keep the truth to one account and the lies to the other than the following achievements should unlock:

Continue playing through this game and finish the long game. Now I don’t know about you but the game is so shit that you probably wont have unlocked, however when you finish the game then you’ll definitely unlock:

And if you’ve kept both accounts to the truth/lie formula, you should also unlock:

At this point what I did was say “Sod it, I’ll do the game achievements later” and went on to do the very easy Hot Seat achievements. To unlock these, all you need to do is answer all the questions in one round as a lie, then answer one as a truth, this will unlock you these four achievements:

After doing this, continue playing Hot Seat until you unlock:

Okay, so that’s Hot Seat done, now we’ve had a break from the Party Mode it’s time to go back to it and get the final few achievements done. It’s hit or miss once again and you may not have unlocked a few of the achievements beforehand but don’t worry, it wont take too long.

For “Choir of Angels” just make sure both players are answering truthfully at all times. The opposite will be done for “Morally Bankrupt”, wherein you need to answer with lies every time. Dubious should just come naturally anyway so don’t worry about that one.

Finally, the last achievement should also unlock along with these last achievements.

This should unlock when you go for the “Morally Dubious” achievement unless by random chance you end the game with both players on exactly the same points.

That’s it for Truth or Lies, there wasn’t too much word related stuff in that because the majority of the achievements will just come naturally. Anyway, congratulations on your new 1000G and completion of this bloody awful game.

Ewan Rants: Digital Homicide and Jim Sterling

Image result for digital homicide

Considering the only image I could find on Google was a low res image that just said the words “Digital Homicide”, I think we’re all in for a treat. In short, these silly buggers tried to sue Jim Sterling. For $10 Million. Oh dear we are in trouble.

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Gamepad: Five Annoying Game Design Problems

Bottlenecks.jpg     Games are usually lighthearted and fun, designed to make you spend as much time as possible on them. Some games do it by throwing endless amounts of content at you, others are designed to be difficult on purpose so you don’t steamroll through everything, which is the reason why games like Dark Souls and Bloodborne are so popular, sometimes there are games that have a glitch that screws up your entire progress or makes it impossible to continue. So I’ve decided to make a list of the five bottlenecks you’ll encounter throughout your gaming “career”.

5. Misleading In-game Map

Deus Ex: Human Revolution for having one of the worst maps when it comes to objective tracking. I can’t tell you the amount of times I’ve gotten stuck because my objective was upstairs instead of downstairs or vice versa.

yg1jn   World of Warcraft is also a culprit in this matter. When completing a quest the map has no indication on where you have to go to deliver it. It has random pointers and you can read the quest log to find your goal, but for a game that’s 12 years old this should have existed since the beginning.

4. Purposefully Difficult Games

Dark Souls I’m looking at you. Now I understand that we’ve kinda become spoiled nowadays when it comes to game difficulty, but I’ve never been comfortable with the idea that Dark Souls’ claim to fame is how hard it is.1192879-ninja-gaiden-backgrounds-for-pc-1920x1080

And it’s not even the hardest game. Ninja Gaiden is a lot more harder than Dark Souls for no apparent reason but to screw with gamers. I like both of these games, but getting killed over and over again is not my thing…

3. The Game is Long, but it’s Not

secrets_of_london_whitechapel_1_map   Assassin’s Creed games are infamous for having a good amount of story, but throwing endless amounts of collectibles and things to upgrade in your way, which is honestly dumb. I enjoyed collecting keys, scrolls and even the shanties, but with every new iteration there are more and more collectibles and even mini-challenges. Collectibles are great, but in moderation. When the game map is covered in tiny icons, then we have a problem.

2. One Bug to Bug them All

Bugs, glitches and every type of programming mistake ever are one of the worst things one encounter while gaming. Sometimes the bugs are small and almost non-existent, some are IN YOUR FACE like the facial glitches in Assassin’s Creed Unity. But the worst of all are the game-breaking ones. Subtle things that make the game crash, not boot up, or even have a point where it constantly crashes and you can’t progress forward.

2732023-289650_screenshots_2014-11-11_00006 Arkham Knight caused quite a controversy over this, on one hand it was a great open world game and ran great on consoles, however the PC port was nigh unplayable and the devs don’t know what to do with the game even a year later.

1. Premium Content in Premium Content

I bought your game once, why do you still want me to give money for it? Oh, but you don’t have to – these items are for the people that want to speed their progress. LIES! Supply drops, helix credits, silver, constant equipment DLC. These are all crappy ideas that were once akin to freemium games, but have managed to crawl themselves inside of AAA titles as well. I hate the fact that Call of Duty’s best guns come from Supply Drops or that I have the option to buy customization options and whatnot for my Assassins, or the fact that Overwatch has loot boxes which you can earn, but you’re heavily encouraged to buy them. I know that developing games is costly, but I’m starting to feel like I’m being nickled and dimed in every game.

maxresdefault   And I hate the argument “It’s just for cosmetic purposes, it has no impact on your game”. First of all, buyable skins were the step before CoD got supply drops and secondly, IT’S STILL PART OF THE GAME! No matter how puny and unnecessary it may seem, there is an incentive to buy it, nonetheless. And I want it for goodness’ sake.