Achievement Unlocked! – Level 22

Platform: Xbox One
Time to Complete: 3 – 4 Hours
Gamerscore Available: 1000G
Gamerscore Achievable: 1000G

Oh count your lucky, lucky, lucky stars. This game is good and it’s an easy 1000G. We’re taking another break from playing games like Roblox and King Kong again to focus on a game I picked up a while ago solely for achievements. I was surprised as to how fun it was. So, on with the game.

I’m going to guide you through the entire game. All four worlds of it, with all the collectables and everything. It’s primarily a stealth game, but if I can do a stealth game, everyone can.

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An Hour With: Turning Point: Fall of Liberty

Another WW2 shooter? Oh joy. But wait, this is an alternate history WW2 shooter? Fair enough then! I thought I’d use this as a way to get through my backlog also, and what better way to do that than to play all the damned shooters I’ve bought.

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Achievement Unlocked – Truth or Lies

Platform: Xbox 360
Time to Complete: 1 – 2 Hours
Gamerscore Available: 1000G
Gamerscore Achievable: 1000G

This game is good. Lie. 1000G please. Unfortunately it isn’t as easy as that, I wish it was, but no, we’re going to need one or two things. Firstly, you need the microphone that comes with the Lips games. Luckily I had two for whatever reason, but it’s the only way the game will work I believe.

Now then, starting the game you’ll need to calibrate your microphone and make an account name. Register eight separate names after calibrating your microphone to unlock three separate achievements:

Now that you’ve done these three. Exit out to the main menu, start-up a “Long Game” with two profiles.¬†With the first account, try to aim for always being truthful. The second account for lies. The voice calibration is awful and this system will probably fall through pretty quickly, just keep trying to make it truths for account 1 and lies for account 2.

The very first question, answer it in less than 6 seconds by filling the bar (stick the microphone to your throat and yell or something, that’s what I did) to unlock:

As this is on account 1, it should hopefully register as the truth, which will also unlock:

Now obviously use account 2, take more than 9 seconds to answer the question, this will unlock:

As you’ve told your first lie in the game (hopefully it worked) you will also unlock:

Now you’ll be onto your third question. For the next two achievements just let the timer run out. It’ll unlock you:

Do it twice more to unlock:

Now after doing all this round one should be over. If you managed to keep the truth to one account and the lies to the other than the following achievements should unlock:

Continue playing through this game and finish the long game. Now I don’t know about you but the game is so shit that you probably wont have unlocked, however when you finish the game then you’ll definitely unlock:

And if you’ve kept both accounts to the truth/lie formula, you should also unlock:

At this point what I did was say “Sod it, I’ll do the game achievements later” and went on to do the very easy Hot Seat achievements. To unlock these, all you need to do is answer all the questions in one round as a lie, then answer one as a truth, this will unlock you these four achievements:

After doing this, continue playing Hot Seat until you unlock:

Okay, so that’s Hot Seat done, now we’ve had a break from the Party Mode it’s time to go back to it and get the final few achievements done. It’s hit or miss once again and you may not have unlocked a few of the achievements beforehand but don’t worry, it wont take too long.

For “Choir of Angels” just make sure both players are answering truthfully at all times. The opposite will be done for “Morally Bankrupt”, wherein you need to answer with lies every time. Dubious should just come naturally anyway so don’t worry about that one.

Finally, the last achievement should also unlock along with these last achievements.

This should unlock when you go for the “Morally Dubious” achievement unless by random chance you end the game with both players on exactly the same points.

That’s it for Truth or Lies, there wasn’t too much word related stuff in that because the majority of the achievements will just come naturally. Anyway, congratulations on your new 1000G and completion of this bloody awful game.

Achievement Unlocked: 6180 The Moon

Platform: Xbox One
Time to Complete: 2 – 5 Hours
Gamerscore Available: 1000G
Gamerscore Achievable: 1000G

If you’re any good at platforming games, this will be no trouble for you. However I’m really terrible at them, so it took me five hours of on and off play before I finally sat down, thought “sod it” and went off to finish it. After weeks and weeks, I finally managed to complete it, and what a pain in the arse it was. I’m not a fan of platformers, unless it’s Super Mario, Crash Bandicoot or Spyro.

It starts off fairly easy and if I can 100% it then so can you, best of luck! I’ll link a video in case you need it but the majority of it is fairly straight forward.

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An Hour With: Dungeon Siege III

I’ve always enjoyed writing these posts, I get to play games I bought a while ago and never got round to playing. Not this time, this was free with Games with Gold. I just didn’t get round to playing it. Anyway, is it worth playing if you downloaded it for free, or is it worth buying? Or not. That’s the question I’m going to answer when I stop upping the word count for this article in the first paragraph. Maybe I’ll put a read more tag in the middle of this sen

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Ewan attempts to write a reality TV Show

So recently I saw my mam and dad watching Geordie Shore, a show about bumbling thick tosspots from Newcastle going out and getting shit faced to fuck anything that’s three tones of orange away from “Citrus Orange” and then they say “Whey aye man” as all people from Newcastle do. And I thought, if this money-making machine can leach onto any twat with an IQ lower than 45 then I want in on the shit show. I want my piece of the pie and a bit of money on the side. So I went to my local TV broadcasting station, and the conversation went a little bit like this…

Ewan: Hello, I’m Ewan, I called earlier about a new TV Show?

TV Man: Ah yes I remember, the nervous wreck who kept stumbling over his words, yeah, yeah, take a seat. So, what’s the idea for the new show?

Ewan: Well, actually I’ve had a couple of ideas about a number of different things.

TV Man: Excellent, as long as we can slap some gormless bastards into it then we can make enough money to build a rocket made out of cheese on a one way course to Mars.

Ewan: Actually I was thinking it could be a bit more sophisticated than that.

TV Man: Not a chance. That wouldn’t work in a popular environment.

Ewan: But it’s based on the extremely popular game series Fallout and I’ve already planned out the first episode and who would be cast and why, along with creating a rich story that links in with the games.

TV Man: Nah, it’s shite, anything else?

Ewan: Well, I did have this idea to do with sketch shows…

TV Man: I’m listening

Ewan: Well, take the very best sketch shows, so for example Monty Python and Mitchell and Webb, then take the very best sketches from these shows and re-perform them with the same actors and in HD cameras and so on.

TV Man: So it’d basically be a way of revitalising and commemorating the best of British humour?

Ewan: Precisely.

TV Man: Nah, it’s bollocks, I’m running out patience here you stupid cunt, so you better come up with something good.

Ewan: How about a reality TV Show?

TV Man: There’s plenty of those, Big Brother, Geordie Shore, Made in Chelsea, The Only Way is Essex, Blackadder, what makes yours so special?

Ewan: Well a number of things actually.

TV Man: Would you care to name a few of them?

Ewan: For a start, it would be an elimination system similar to that of Big Brother, but instead of being evicted they all have explosive collars on and when evicted they go all Battle Royale and their collars explode, splashing orange everywhere.

TV Man: Christ Ewan, that’s a bit barbaric isn’t it?

Ewan: Nah, they’re all thickos that we can pick up off of any street in Clapham.

TV Man: Alright, fair enough, it’s a good start, but what else have you got?

Ewan: Well, the winner will receive a lifetime supply of fake tan.

TV Man: Fucking sold, where do I sign?

Now this very real conversation happened not so long ago, and you can catch The Only Way is Purging The Thickos on BBC 4 at 1:30am, I think I’ve been buggered by the listing times, but hopefully it does well, I’m getting paid in ice cream and Um Bongo.

An Hour With: Mirrors Edge

I quite recently purchased this game and planned to play it over the weekend. I played Wolfenstein: The Old Blood over the weekend instead. No matter, I’ll play it now and be back in an hour.

Right, well then. That was something else. You can take that as good or bad, if you want to find out what my opinion is (which you probably don’t) then click the “Read More” thing, if I remember to put the bloody thing in.

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